When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
