thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Randomize