everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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