words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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