Soap is not a condiment
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
