I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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