i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize