that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
