I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
