i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
