You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Two words: blizzard sex
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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