Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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