How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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