hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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