I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
