She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
My vagina is officially offended.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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