I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
