Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
