is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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