Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
