it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
