it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
