plz talk dirty to me
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
