I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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