there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
