i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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