im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
