Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
