Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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