I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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