And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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