I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
