Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize