He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
