Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
