its not stalking. its research.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
