Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
