I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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