He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
