so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
