It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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