i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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