Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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