Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
