omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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