Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize