He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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