Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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