I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize