i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
