If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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