So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
