isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
